Angels are watching over me

A blog post from my other blog The Chocolate Poet:

This poem inspired by Mast Chocolate: Almond Butter Chocolate 50% Cocoa

Aroma and tasting notes: Smooth Sweet, Brown Sugar, Cocoa, Vanilla, Cream, Sweet butter, Blueberries, Caramel

Angels are watching over me

Laying on a blanket
looking up at the stars

The sky is a jet stream of
beautifully painted purple hues

I can see myself in the reflection

I see love
Divine love
Pure love

Angels are watching
over me

Their arms wide open
welcoming me home

Is that angel dust
falling from the sky?

The sun is bright yellow
and warm
I feel loved

I see Castles in the sky
while the song plays in my head

Healing visions of love

Amberley Charlotte ©2022

What pulls you in

A post from my other blog: The Chocolate Poet:

This poem inspired by Mast Chocolate: Oat Milk 50% Cocoa

Aroma and tasting notes: Sweet, Dark Sugar, Cocoa, Rustic, Cream, Raspberries, Raisins, Oats, Creamy

What pulls you in

Walking down a country Lane

My path not
yet understood

Where am I going?

Then she whispers
Wait, enjoy the walk

But be content
Be ready
Take it all in
There is a time for everything

Stop waiting for success

What pulls you in
is who you are
where you’re going

Be content
There will be
a destination

Amberley Charlotte ©2022

What if?

What if?

I didn’t know
I could

I didn’t believe
I would

I hoped
but never thought

The stairs are
and winding

When I look
I get sick

What if I fall?
What if I fail?
What if I can’t hang on?
What if it destroys me?

What if?
What if?
What if?








Don’t look down
Don’t look back

Blinders on
Goal in sight

Focus Forward!

Can you live
with a lifetime
of regrets?

What if
you find peace?

What if
you find joy?

What if
you heal?

What if
it’s everything
you wanted?

Don’t wait
any longer

Start now!

Amberley Charlotte ©2022

Photo Cred: Nick Fewings:

At The End Of My Pen

I stood at the edge of a mountain
wondering if I could fly

I battled the beast of cancer
fearful I might die

I traveled a million miles
looking for contentment
in the world

And I’ve always come back
to the end of my pen

I ran from evil carrying chains
and scaled concrete walls
to survive

I gave birth to angels
and witnessed
the miracles of life

I’ve hidden my light
in a dark
out of fear
of disapproval
and rage

And I’ve always come back
to the end of my pen

I found my soul mate
when our lives intertwined
sharing secrets
and love
at the end of my pen

The end of my pen
where stories are told
lives unfold
and perspective
comes from rebelling

The world I create
the risks I take
the rules I break
then healing comes
at the end of my pen

Insecurity strangled me
Doubt silenced my dreams

Chocolate came
unlocked my heart
and stories
poured out
for all to see

The search is over
I’m finally home
in my own skin

Excited to explore
the worlds inside of me

Yet curious
what lies
at the end of my pen

Amberley Charlotte ©6.14.2022
Photo Cred:

My seat at the table!

I love chocolate. I love the textures, flavors, and aromas. I love the creativity, the possibilities, and the way it makes me feel.

Chocolate does not judge. If Chocolate were throwing a party, everyone would be included, and no one would be left behind. It sees no color, gender, sexual preference, political party, weight, size, or financial status.

Chocolate is personal. Everyone who tastes it will have different experiences. Chocolate will greet you and bring a sensory experience that is uniquely yours.

Grab a cup of tea, and let me step back for a minute. I think this might help you understand where my heart is right now.

This year I threw myself into this beautiful medium. I started following people on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook. I signed up for classes with The International Institute of Chocolate and Cacao and had a wild experience!

We learned where cacao beans are grown, how the farmers are treated, and how the beans are fermented, dried, sorted then sent to the chocolate makers who take those beans and create magic.

We profiled chocolate bars and learned how to differentiate aromas, flavors, defects, and how to notice different acidity levels, complexity, and balance. We learned about the origins of chocolate, the large companies, the smaller companies, and who forged a path for the craft chocolate makers today.

But I felt different.

While my classmates were writing about balance, acidity, and mouthfeel, I was writing stories and poems. I began to feel and even mentioned in class that I was the class freak.

I understood the concept, I can smell an orange a mile away and taste raisin in a chocolate bar, but it wasn’t me.

When I taste chocolate, my world explodes!
I see words, stories, visions, pictures, colors, and smells. I’m overwhelmed and filled with joy, peace, and comfort because, at that point, I am opening my heart, accepting myself for who I am, and in those moments, I am being 100% authentically Amberley!

I learned so much, but with all the education I received, my greatest gift was finding myself,  refusing to apologize for it, and embracing the unique abilities that allow me to see things differently.

I bought two chocolate refrigerators and started purchasing bars from all over the world. I want to taste as many bars as I can to see what stories come out of them.

But I was a bit naïve. I wanted so badly to become a certified chocolate taster and pass these tests. I didn’t think that there might not be a place for me in this chocolate world.

What happens to those who love chocolate but don’t fit the mold?
What if you can’t comprehend the lessons taught by educational institutions?
What about those with health issues that prevent them from taking courses?

And what happens to the incredibly creative, think outside the box, unique individuals in this world who can spin webs of colors, flavors, and aromas and articulate them in a way that the Chocolate community has never seen before?

Is there room for them at the table?
Right now, no.

Society paints those of us with special abilities as different, broken, and not normal. We need to stop seeing ourselves as less than the “experts.”  

We might not be able to tell you the acidity levels, the complexity, and the balance in the chocolate, but we can tell you stories about where that Chocolate has been, how it makes us feel, how it speaks to us, and the vibrant explanations, descriptions, and definitions that will make you fall in love with chocolate again!

So I’ve been thinking.
What is an “expert?”
Who gives them the title “expert”?
I mean, everyone started somewhere, and education looks different for everybody.

But what honestly qualifies someone to decide if you’re invited to have a voice in any community?

The ”experts” have the loudest voices. They believe in themselves enough to create organizations, businesses, and schools, and they value their vision and make their dreams happen.

Some people would look at my blog and see that I am a level one certified chocolate taster. Does that make me an expert? Some might think so.

But I can’t remember what I had for breakfast yesterday, let alone what I learned in a class for four weeks, and then took a test that, by the grace of the chocolate gods, I happened to pass.

I am incredibly proud of myself for getting through the course, but I feel no more equipped now that I have that certification than I did before.

Yes, I have the knowledge, and yes, some of it is gone already. But does that make me any less valuable in this chocolate industry?

It does not.

I want a seat at this table in this beautiful medium of chocolate, not just for me but for those already there that are fighting to be heard and for those coming up that won’t get involved because they know there’s no place for them.

I am a bull in a china shop. OK, I am an emotional bull in a china shop.
If I feel unwanted, or there’s no space for me in this world, I will get angry, cry a little bit, and then I will move flipping mountains to make space for myself and others because I believe that everybody deserves to be seen, heard, and valued for who they are!

Chocolate is creative!
Chocolate never put itself in a box!
Neither should we!

I don’t need permission to be invited to this table.
I am inviting myself!
I have pulled up a chair!

The community needs more creativity. It needs people to be open and honest and share their truths, not trying to fit into a box but instead breaking out of that damn box!

Creative chocolate makers need to be seen and acknowledged for their willingness to bring chocolate to a higher level.

Chocolate educators need to be willing to share all that’s in their hearts and use their experiences to educate even if they feel pushback because there will be people in their classes that feel different and don’t fit.

Chocolate tasters need to feel free enough to release the chains, close their eyes, feel their emotions and let the chocolate speak to them.

When I was in class, I compared myself to the other students, and they compared themselves to me, and it felt like an emotional shit show of comparison between adults because we didn’t value what we brought to the class.

Stop comparing yourself!
You are enough!
You are special!
Your talents are uniquely yours!
Stop trying so hard to figure out what’s “wrong” with you and focus on what’s right!

Decide what you want to do with chocolate and stop asking permission or seeking the approval of others. This is your dream, not theirs!

Before a chocolate bar gets to you, it has passed through the loving hands of cacao farmers, and each one has a story. It is then moved to the chocolate makers who put their hearts and soul into their bars.

The chocolate has a story to tell, and it will speak to you. Chocolate is passion, love, creativity, encouragement, meditative, support, and healing for our bodies. It teaches us about ourselves, who we are, and who we want to be. Chocolate inspires, educates, and encourages.

We need to be more inclusive in this community. We need to find ways to leave a seat open for those who want it. We need to extend an olive branch. We need to value what they bring to the table. We need to encourage, embrace, and support their differences instead of ignoring the situation because we don’t know how to fix it.

The reality is I don’t need a seat at the table.
I’m going to build my own table with enough chairs for everyone.
Care to join me?

Amberley Charlotte

Photo Cred:

Chocolate Heart Story: Kaleidoscope

I didn’t plan on writing this today. I’ve been studying so hard for my chocolate tasting exam and that requires me to be analytical and focused.

I like to live like someone left the gate open. I like to put pen to paper and scribble words to see what comes up. I like to finger paint with honey, jam, and peanut butter, all over the kitchen table.

I believe when we allow ourselves freedom we find magic in our minds. I find colors and shapes and stories. I believe when we give ourselves permission we can heal from the baggage, the pain, and whatever holds us back. I believe that self-care and play therapy is extremely important and sometimes even more important than taking tests and being a grown-up.

Without balance we have stress, inflammation, agitation, and there is no peace, no rest, and no joy.

I haven’t given myself a lot of time to write lately because the certification is so important to me and honestly I really want to pass this test.

But I am an artist first and when I put myself on time out, or I build a box around my heart, I force myself to live within certain parameters, and that suffocates me.

I had zero intentions of starting the chocolate heart story series. It was never part of my thought process for this blog. But I also wasn’t prepared to share about Synesthesia. I kept it hidden. I was ashamed and from experiences in life it was appropriate to keep it hidden and not share my beautiful wildly vivid visions with the world.

But no more hiding. We cannot be authentic and have authentic relationships when we are hiding. If we are not truthful with ourselves we struggle to be honest with others.

Through this Chocolate journey I have embraced my quirky. I have learned to love every bit of crazy that I bring to the world. I have learned to explore more of who I am instead of trying to be somebody I am not.

So if you’re still reading and I haven’t lost you yet, I will tell you I have no idea what comes next. Bloggers are supposed to have a plan and a format, I have none.

But I know this, I am on a journey of self exploration and self acceptance. I am a little bit crazy, a whole lot of quirky, a freaking basket of compassion, love, and empathy, with a splash of rebellion.

I want to help people heal. I want to help them find joy. I want them to release the chains and live life fully not fearfully, and I believe that Chocolate can be the leader on this journey of self discovery. Maybe we can do this together.

Please enjoy the poem below. This poem came out of tasting beautiful chocolate made by MillCreek Cacao Roasters This BlackBerry 70% dark chocolate bar is made with 3 simple, ingredients: Certified Heirloom cacao, pure cane sugar, and cocoa butter.

The blackberry, caramel and dark sugar notes are amazing! This Chocolate will bring a cool smooth sensation to your mouth. If you close your eyes and let the chocolate talk to you, you just might be surprised what it will say.

To be transparent, I never called myself an artist before. I guess I didn’t realize I had that gift until it became clear to me in the poem you’re about to read. All of it inspired by tasting this bar. This is what happens to me when I smell and taste chocolate.

I know, life is rough right?
I am acutely aware of how blessed I am.

Thank you for hanging out with me today, enjoy the poem.


Our Lives
A kaleidoscope of missed opportunities
Chances we’ve been given
Doors we’ve closed

Longing to be loved, seen, and understood for who we are, not what the world requires us to be

No more masks
No hiding
No limitations
The chains are broken
There’s no room for self-doubt

The winding road welcomes us
The sweet smell of blackberry reminds us to breathe

We are artists
Passionate, eccentric, driven
We need to create
We need to inspire

When we’re lost
The world feels unsafe

Then inspiration draws us in
Creativity soothes us
Passion drives us
And when our hearts are full
We find our way home


AmberleyCharlotte ©2022
Inspired by Millcreek Cacao Roasters: Farm to bar
Certified Heirloom Cacao: Blackberry 70% Dark Chocolate
Arriba Nacional Hacienda Limon Farm: Ecuador

Chocolate Heart Story: Cacaosuyo 70% Piura Select

This is my first Chocolate Heart Story.
This is my experience tasting Cacaosuyo 70% Piura Select chocolate bar.

I’m a chocolate taster and a writer with a surreal connection to chocolate.
When I taste chocolate I’m able to experience the beautiful aromas, flavor notes, astringency, bitterness, and all of the nuances that go into creating a craft chocolate bar.

But then something else happens. I start seeing stories. I feel deep emotional connections. These are not memories, wishes, or dreams. They are feelings, words, and visions that form stories while the flavors of the chocolate bar melt in my mouth. Are the stories of my life? Are they moments that I’ve had? Sometimes, sometimes not at all.

At first, I was confused. I didn’t wanna tell anyone. But the comfort I feel when I taste these bars is something I wish everyone could experience. I realize how lucky I am. It’s time to embrace this gift, share it with others, and enjoy the blessings that come with these beautiful chocolate bars made passionately by so many enormously talented people.

So please enjoy my first Chocolate heart story.

As a chocolate taster I found notes of fresh citrus and nuts, balanced with chocolate and dark sugars. This is a creamy, sweet dark chocolate bar and it took me away and this is what I wrote.

I’m cold
Worrying about everyone and everything

I hit a wall
I want to sleep
This mountain is too hard to climb alone
I need a rest, quiet, and peace

And there you are reaching out your hand
You know I can do it

The sunshine warms me
I can reach the top
I’ve won so many battles
I will win this one too

My friend
You are here
Comforting me
Holding me
Loving me

I’m warm now
I’m stronger
Let’s climb this mountain

Amberley Charlotte

Brain trauma, Tests, Chocolate & Superheros!

It’s 9:00 AM. I have my first Chocolate tasting Level 1 exam on Monday, and I’m terrified! But I believe when we share, we heal, and maybe someone reading this will feel seen and heard.

I’ve been putting off talking about this on the blog, but lately, I seem to be telling total strangers, so what the hell!

For as early as I can remember, my teachers would start their sentences with:
“She can’t comprehend,” “She’s off in her own world,” “She doesn’t apply herself,” “She can’t pass this class,” “She won’t pass this grade,” “She’s not trying.” And the one teacher that I adored said: “It’s a good thing you’re pretty because this world will be hard for you.”

This type of wording beats a child down! It leads people like me down a rabbit hole of quitting because we begin to feel useless, thinking we’re not going to succeed anyway, so why try?

It wasn’t until my best friend, who was an educator at the time, explained to me what she believed was happening. Her words soothed me and brought so much clarity, hope, and freedom. Because of her, I realized it wasn’t how I learned; it was how they taught. I accepted my different abilities, loved myself through the challenges, stopped blaming myself for things I could not do and cherished the gifts I was given.

We need to listen to our children! They need to be heard, seen, and loved for who they are and not criticized for what they cannot do, or the abilities they don’t have, but instead loved for what they offer this world and the beautiful, intuitive, creative, emotional beings they are!

Years later, as an adult, I had dizzy spells, and after a brain MRI, it was confirmed that I had brain trauma. The neurologist asked me to write down every time I had an accident or trauma to the head. And I made a list of the bicycle accidents, the concussions when I was knocked unconscious for long periods at a time, the car accidents, the “accidents” from a “boyfriend” beating the shit out of me, beatings from a traumatic childhood, the emotional and physical trauma that your body, mind, and soul holds onto and it all became clear. Still, I felt broken, damaged, and stupid.

Until I realized that I’m a fucking superhero! My little brain survived all of this and is still intact!

And now there’s Chocolate, something I have loved for a long time and has loved me back. But this time, I’m not eating the chocolate; I’m tasting it. It’s healing, meditative, calming, and almost like therapy. There’s a beautiful sensory aspect to tasting chocolate. It’s almost otherworldly and euphoric. I am loving it. I am invested. I’m excited, and I want this so badly!

This exam is not open book. It’s multiple-choice, but I’m relying 100% on my memory, and for me, that is the ultimate of tasks!

But I am doing this to prove something to myself.
Every person who said that I couldn’t…was wrong!

Because those with brain injury, learning disabilities, and different abilities are capable, able, talented, creative, worthy, wanted, and loved!

I may not be the most educated person, but I’ve got compassion, empathy, and love for others boiling out of me, and I want to share it! I know I feel things deeper than most, at an almost painful level, but I accept it’s my gift. I love hard. I work hard, and I never quit!

But anxiety got the best of me; the old voices came into my head, and I kept saying what if I fail? What if I don’t pass? What if I’m not good enough?

And then, don’t laugh, I tasted a piece of chocolate. Because that’s what you do when you’re filled with anxiety!

And it calmed me down.
And I realized just how much I love this medium.
I love learning.
I love learning about chocolate.
I love teaching people.
I love the people I’m meeting, and I love the journey I’m on.

So what if I fail?
I tried!

What if I don’t pass?
I’ll take it again and again until I do.

What if I’m not good enough?
By who’s standards?
No one gets to tell us if we are good enough or not!

I can do this!
Will I do it on Monday? Not sure, but I’m going to try!
It may take me a little while to get there, but I will get there!

I don’t need hits or views on a blog post. I know who is meant to see these posts will see them. I just want to be a little light in a dark world. I hope this gives you the strength to fight for yourself. I hope it gives you the courage to step out of your comfort zone and be who you’re meant to be. I hope you can silence the voices of those who hurt you and realize the only voice and the only opinion that matters is yours!

If you’re a parent, please love your little Superhero today! They may be struggling, you may not understand why, but love them, support them, and guide them through it, and you will be their Superhero!


Amberley Charlotte

Photo Cred: yulia-matvienko-ArA3S3k0wTU-unsplash.jpg

Welcome Home Amberley!

In the meditative world, I’ve seen the terms: “Welcome Home” or “Come home to yourself.” and even though I never knew what it meant, I didn’t want to be the odd one out, so I would nod, smile and hope no one quizzed me on it.

But I’m beginning to realize what that phrase means. At least what it means to me, and this is what I’ve got.

Welcome home: you’re safe here.
Welcome home: you don’t have to pretend anymore.
Welcome home: you don’t have to hide anymore.
Welcome home, honor the unique qualities that make you magical, cherish the quirkiness that makes people laugh, the empathy that makes people comfortable with you, and the kindness that brings people close to you.
Welcome home: even when the introvert needs her space, wants to be alone, and screams for peace and silence, you’re still loved. 

I may be wrong, but I see it as a transformative process, a type of redemption, a healing process. Coming home to your true self, loving and acknowledging that person as loveable, worthy, valuable, and meant to be, and that’s been hard for me. 

This crazy experience with Chocolate is opening me up, helping me accept all of me, not just the parts I want the world to see.

The education through The International Institute of Chocolate and Cacao Tasting is invaluable. The courses are fun, engaging, well thought out, and strategically planned so anyone can feel welcome here and do well.  

But for me, the transformative process started with the chocolate tastings, the magic of the flavors, the textures, the aromas, the lessons, stories, and the calming sense of peace I feel when I am tasting these amazing creations that are made with love from some of the most talented chocolate makers. My eyes have been opened, my taste buds blown away, and my life changed.

I came in here with a plan, but now my heart is open as I wait to see where this journey will take me.

With everything I’m learning and the life-changing experiences I am being given, for some reason, the chocolate is speaking to me and welcoming me home.

Welcome, Home Amberley!

I’ve missed you!

Photo Cred: jullliia-vLhJglizAeU-unsplash.jpg

Chocolate: Magical, Mystical, Intriguing Chocolate

I close my eyes
bring a piece of chocolate to my nose 
deep breathe in
ahh heaven

I place a piece of chocolate on my tongue
it begins to melt
colors floating in my mind


The past, the present, and what could be
Feeling words
Seeing moments
Fragrant flowers
Vibrant fruits

Notes I’ve never smelled before
I’m peaceful

I’ve got to get it out
I’ve got to write it down
I don’t want to forget a moment

What am I seeing?
Where are these beautiful visions coming from?
What are the flavors, aromas, and feelings that overwhelm me?


A gift to the senses
Peace to the brokenhearted
Healing wounds
Opening hearts
Changing lives

If life could be as beautiful as what I see
If life could be as peaceful as what I feel
If life could be as fragrant as what I smell

We would be changed forever
and the world would be a safer place
for all of us


(Photo by