Put on a brave face

Put on a
brave face
it’s party time

But we know the truth

We know who’s valued
We know who’s not

A celebration
fireworks
parties
desserts

Yet so many
are deserted

How dare you say
we’re equal
when you strip
us naked
and leave us
to die

Your pen is a sword
Your vote is poison

Your hearts are cold
Your intentions are evil

Your daughters
will never forget

Neither will we!


Amberley Charlotte ©2022
Photo Cred: ruan-richard-rodrigues-v8fDCzXyG1o-unsplash



We Will Roar To Be Heard!

ROAR TO BE HEARD!

Respect is not taken
You cannot
beat
someone
to gain respect

You cannot buy respect
steal respect
or force respect

Silence may be purchased
Respect will not

To be respected
you must be respectful

Men

We need allies
not captors

We need supporters
not protectors

We need your voices
not your silence

We need action
not platitudes

We need men
we can trust
not jail wardens

We are equal
not less than

We are warriors!
We are strong!
We are capable!
We are driven!

We are fierce!
We are protectors!
We are sisters!

We are the wives
and partners
You vowed to love

The children
you promised to protect

The grandchildren
you waited for

The Mothers  
who gave you life

The Doctors
who saved your life

The Therapists
who listen
to your pain

We need men
who are worthy
of respect

We need community
We need you
We need each other

Stand with us!
Our lives literally depend on it!


Do not be silent!

Give us your voice
Your support
Your respect

And then
You will have earned ours!

We are Lionesses!
We will protect our children!
We will protect each other!

And if we have to
We will
ROAR TO BE HEARD!


Amberley Charlotte @2022
Photo Cred: https://pixabay.com/users/pf%C3%BCderi-199315/

I will rise!

Knock me down
I will rise up

Lock me up
I will escape

Force me into submission
I will gain
strength

You can’t break
A Mother fighting
for her children

You can’t silence
A woman with
a broken heart

You can’t stop
Me!

I will find hope
in the evil
of your eyes

I will find light
in the darkness
of your heart

I will find strength
in your threats

You fuel my fire
You feed my determination
You solidify my resolve

The sun will rise again
and when it does
the world will see

My strength
and your insecurities

My courage
and your cowardice

My compassion
and your hatred

Because in the end

No matter
how hard you try

You will
NEVER
break me!

You will
NEVER
hurt me
AGAIN!

And I will
NEVER
be like
YOU!



Amberley Charlotte ©2022
Photo Cred: Nettie Atkisson

STOP! Violence is never okay!

I am shaking this morning. My heart is racing. I had insomnia all night and found myself curled up in a fetal position. I have seen too many women beaten up by their husbands. I have watched too many children beaten up by their parents. I have watched children terrified as their fathers took out their anger and rage on their mothers. I was a child. I was helpless. No one listened to me. I could do nothing to help. It killed me inside.

Then I became a victim of domestic violence and rape, and I have PTSD.

I wanted very badly for this blog to be upbeat and inspirational. But there is nothing upbeat or inspirational about having someone lay their hands on you and the helplessness you feel when you can’t escape.

Last night, I saw a video on an award show that I typically watch every year. A man whose name I will not repeat here because I don’t want the Google hits from his name. A man I respected because he did a lot of work on himself, a lot of self-reflection, and he brought those lessons into his marriage and had the honor of raising children.

But last night this man got up and hit another man because he was angry. I thought it was part of a skit, so I watched it again, and again trying to prove it was a sick joke. 

It kept me up all night. Because in my world, if you’re willing to hit somebody and let your anger rage, then what’s to stop you from hitting a woman and a child?

All these years later, I still feel vulnerable. I still have nightmares. I still feel unsafe at times, and it is only by getting help and building a support system of trustworthy people that I am able to heal and move forward with the life that I am meant to live.

A trigger is a trigger, and although it might be somebody else’s story, every time a woman is hit, it’s our story. Every time a woman is made to feel ashamed, it’s our story. Every time a woman is devalued and stripped of her dignity, strength, and self-worth, it is our story!

For a very long time, I remained silent. I didn’t want my name synonymous with “domestic violence survivor.” I didn’t want to hear “survivor of rape.” I had enough. I wanted to build a new life, get healthy, leave the demons in the past, and I wanted to stop caring.

Yes, it is possible to heal. We can create happier and safer lives with people we trust, but the demons linger because you get it, you’ve lived it, and as much as you want to try, you never stop caring. What happens to one, happens to all of us!

To be clear, I have no love for the insensitive comedian who verbally attacked this man’s wife. Words hurt. Words degrade. Words devalue. This so-called human being was making fun of a woman’s health issues to make a joke and he showed the world who he really is. He chose his words carefully. He chose to bully and insult her on national television. A man, bullying a woman on national television. Let that sink in. That too is a form of abuse my friends. If he will do that for a “laugh” what else will he do to strip a woman of her dignity? 

I believe violence of any kind whether it be physical, mental, or emotional against anyone, including man, woman, non-binary, LGBTQIAS+, Trans, etc., needs to be prosecuted!

I heard the person’s speech. He said he was being “called to protect.” I understand his feeling of wanting to protect his wife. I know a few men in my life who would do all they could to protect me as well. But there are ways to protect somebody without laying your hands on another person! He did this out of honor for his wife, and some people find that commendable; I believe there are other ways to honor her and protect her. 

Last night, he showed all the little boys and girls who look up to him that it’s okay to hurt another person if you’re protecting someone else and this so-called comedian showed his young followers that cruelty is acceptable as long as you are on television. 

I have plenty of anger and rage in me, trust me, but it takes one moment to make the wrong decision. We are in control of our emotions and actions. We are in control of the words that come out of our mouths and how we respond to somebody. Nobody should ever get off for inflicting violence on somebody because “they were angry,” or because “they lost it,” or they “were in a trance.”

Take responsibility for your actions!

Keep your hands to yourself and quit making excuses!

At the top of this blog, I have a page titled Helping Hands. There are helpful links on that page.

But I am listing two very important numbers here for those who need support. 

These are numbers and link to the National Domestic Violence Hotline and RAINN, the nation’s largest sexual assault hotline.

Please call the numbers below if you are scared, if someone is hurting you, and if you have no one to turn to.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline: confidential support 24/7/365.

800-799-7233 or  SMS: Text START to 88788 

RAINN: The Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network

https://www.rainn.org/

1-800-656-4673

It took me a long time to get away from my abuser. For me, the only possible way of leaving without being killed or him keeping his promise to kill my family was attempted suicide. 

Don’t let that happen to you. You are loved. You have love to give. You are worthy.

With love, hope, and blessings,

Amberley Charlotte